Non-drinking buzzkills not allowed!


First, a moment of praise: Southern Honey cooked dinner!  I had stopped by WalMart to pick up a few things for a new recipe I want to try, and by the time I got home, he’d popped some chicken and scalloped potatoes in the oven.  It was certainly a nice surprise.

So, teriyaki grilled pork chops are pushed back to tomorrow night.

And now for something completely different: Non-drinkers at drinking parties.

This came up today in a conversation when someone mentioned that he hadn’t been invited to a party with his friends because he doesn’t drink.  He had previously been good enough company to serve as his friends’ designated driver when they had gone out drinking, but not for this party — they didn’t think he would enjoy himself, apparently.

Lots of people defended not inviting non-drinkers to drinking parties, stating that non-drinkers are buzzkills and wouldn’t be able to have fun.  I got chastised for trying to figure out why they felt that way, because it’s such an alien concept to me.

Southern Honey doesn’t drink.  It doesn’t do him any good, since he metabolizes it so quickly he doesn’t even hit the buzzed stage.  However, that’s never stopped him from throwing parties or attending them and having a good time.  And it’s never stopped our friends from inviting him.  Which is good, because if they had stopped inviting him, we would have had to find new friends.

I mean, this is the man who overheard a friend who had been drinking talk about going streaking, got a bug in his own bonnet and rounded up everyone at the party to take a naked jog down the street and back.  All while he himself was totally sober (and yes, from what I’ve been told, he did indeed strip down with the drunk people and go for a run).  He’s also the one who turned our game of “Truth or Dare” Jenga into “Truth, Dare or Drink” Jenga, writing drink instructions on the blank wooden blocks.

Someone said that someone drinking soda instead of booze during drinking games would be at such an advantage as to take all the fun from the game.

We must have played different drinking games, because he certainly didn’t win more than his fair share (possibly because Jenga doesn’t have winners, just a loser :P).  We used to play darts with some friends.  Southern Honey and I both suck at darts, but one of our friends plays all the time when he’s at home; he plays while he’s drinking all the time and gets better as he drinks.  “I Never” doesn’t have winners or losers, just lots of drinking.  “Asshole” has a winner, as does “Circle of Death,” but he’s just as apt to forget about that damned Little Green Man as the next person, booze or no booze.  *laughs*

So, obviously, my experience here is vastly different from the people I was talking with who would have no problems excluding someone like Southern Honey from a party simply because of his drinking preferences.  But I’m still having a hard time understanding what they’ve been doing that would be no fun without someone sober around to drive them to Wendy’s afterwards for after-midnight snacks.

Can someone else enlighten me here?

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About SouthernSugar

A Southern girl who's used to small town life, I found myself moving to Washington, DC, in 2008 for a new job, and living there was an eye-o
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2 Responses to Non-drinking buzzkills not allowed!

  1. Mary says:

    I don’t know that I can help you understand this, either. Although in my own experience, I have noticed that the people who are most likely to say that a party is no fun with non-drinkers in attendance, or that non-drinkers won’t have fun at a party, are also the people most likely to get completely and totally smashed.

    Personally, even though I do sometimes drink, I don’t really think the type of party where you must be drunk to have fun is worth my time at all. I actually think that type of party is usually incredibly boring even when I am drinking. If I’m going to risk a hangover and consume all those calories, I’d rather do it at a party that’s fun on its own merits, you know? And that’s the type of party that’s fun even if someone isn’t drinking.

    I guess I just don’t really understand the appeal of that sort of party, at least not once you’re out of college. It’s not all that fun, and it’s often a pretty huge investment of time (since the recovery from the party often takes as long as the party itself). That type of drinking often just strikes me as sort of immature.

    • I’ve noticed that, too, and I just don’t get it. I mean, who else is going to take you on that inevitable Fourth Meal run to Taco Bell if you don’t have a non-drinker (or at least a light drinker) in attendance?

      I’m trying to think if I’ve ever been at a party that wouldn’t have been fun if I hadn’t been drinking… There was one, maybe two, but they were hosted by people I no longer hang out with unless absolutely necessary (I have a couple of friends who still hang out with them, despite a lot of shady, underhanded behavior). When they were parties with our friends, though, it was like our normal hangout nights, but with more games, more people and more drinks. Because of that, the idea of not inviting someone I enjoy hanging out with just because they don’t drink is so totally out of my realm of experience.

      We did just go to a party where there was entirely too much drinking going on when Southern Honey and I went back to Hog Town this year. Had a fantastic time, but I realized I’m too old for that sort of thing. *laughs*

      But drinking parties just to drink? Don’t get ’em.

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